emphasize the positive!

So a lot of really great things have been happening lately, I have failed to mention most of them because, I'm not sure, maybe wallowing in self pity just seemed more fun? I've neglected my responsibility to get you totally pumped on the awesome things in my life, and for this, I apologize!

Last night was super fun, I booked a show at Gilman but also wanted to see a show at the local dive bar. The only problem is the shows were an hour apart driving. Boy do I hate driving, but I made it work. I went to gilman, enjoyed sets by Boats, Secretions and Kepi The Band! (Kepi played drums the whole set while standing up, is there anything that man can't do?) I also ate FREE VEGAN CAKE which was awesome and bought a wonderfully delicious vegan donut. Oh the Joys and splendors of food, it always puts me in a better mood!

In my intense "sugar rush" state I jumped and danced a lot and flicked a bunch of light switches to create a spectaacular "light show" for Kepi and hugged a million people and then ran off to drive to the Off with their heads show. That driving part sucked but you can't win em all!


When I got there my friends the Hard girls had already left the stage, I was a little bummed but I just saw them a few weeks ago so I'll be okay. I said Hi to a few people and propped myself on a bar stool by the stage area to watch the Re-Volts! They were awesome, Spike is so handsome and sounded great. Their drummer made weird mupped noises before every song and they were incredibly fun to watch. The audience kind of sucked for them, maybe they just weren't drunk enough to act a fool with me.

After their set I went up and said Hi to Ryan from OWTH, got a big hug, and then slowly realized I knew AT LEAST 20 people in this tiny bar, it was like a weird high school reunion without the people I actually went to school with part. I guess I get around. I got a few "holy shit I haven't seen you in forever"s and tons of hugs. It was a really great feeling.

Off with their heads was amazing, this drunk guy kept trying to mess with me by standing in front of me and then I would move and he would do it again, I'm pretty sure he was flirting with me but if he really liked me he should have bought me a Shirley temple or something. Instead all he got was a few fierce fist shakings. I also got accused of trying to steal Zack's guitar, I mean I totally was but you'd think they'd trust me by now.

I played some photo hunt game with Ryan and Lisa, they were WAY better at it than me. I guess I need to go to bars more to practice. When I said goodbye for the night I got more hugs and Ryan squeezed my glasses against my face (on purpose) so I peeled them off my face and dropped them (on purpose) and groped my way around until he picked them up for me. Before he handed them back to me he put my hand on his face (think Helen Keller) and said "its me, Ryan" which was probably the funniest thing that happened all night.

I'm off to Berkeley now for night two of punk rock Joels birthday show madness! More OWTH, more Thorns of life! I saw them at a house show wednesday, great tunes, totally amazing people. I talked to Blake and Daniela for a while and they were both so nice! Okay I really have to go now!

desperately seeking danny

This week has been pretty hectic, tonight was the first time I really got to stay home and do nothing. I had plans but my friend flaked, it was a welcome flakiness because quite frankly I needed a break.

I have been feeling extremely conflicted with a lot of things lately, I've been more sensitive to my surroundings and more desiring of attention. I have been under a lot of stress lately and I'm suspecting that's what's triggered it. I'm really hoping its just some sort of evil PMS and will be gone soon.

I really miss having someone to talk to, more specifically a male, to say nice things to me. The last one didn't pan out so well, I'm not exactly sure what happened but I think it was my fault. So why am I the one who was hurt? I guess I understand, but not really. I wish he would explain it. It's been months now, I really need to get over this. I suck, that's enough self deprication for one night.

THIS WEEKEND

joelcolor, originally uploaded by prettymesss.

yo bloggers!! I booked these awesome shows this weekend, if anyone local reads this you should totally go! up the punx!

update!!

despite our "diffences", you're still a douche bag.

also:

you're totally right, what was I thinking!?

I hate to admit...

... how terrified I am of losing you for good, how much my hands shake as I write this, and how often I still cry over you.

accomplishments!!

Yesterday I accomplished the following things;

- Orange peel fight (I totally won)

- Mosh

- Beating my friends unmercifully with a foam sword

- Dodged flying garbage

- Did the dishes

- Failed at rainy day BBQ

- Ate pasta for the 24th consecutive day in a row (year of the noodle motherfucker)

- Compiled a bad ass ipod mix that made my friends giggle

- Hugged a lot

- Impressed my friends with the amount of Trick Daddy lyrics I knew

- Made a baby laugh

Why the panhandlers in Berkeley deserve my money.

924 023, originally uploaded by prettymesss.

the big chair

Everyone needs to escape once in a while, luckily my work place was designed with its very own escape pod. You must traverse through the aisles, past the spinning elvis, through the elvis door, up the pink stairs, through the glass door and finally you will reach the last door. This door, adorned with the likeness of the great Fat Albert is very rarely noticed, and hides the perfect spot for me to escape, collect my thoughts and sit.

Beyond the door is a maze of white bankers boxes, filled with reciepts and stacked to the ceiling blocking out most of the light and all vision from outside. I never turn on the lights in this room because just enough filters in to make me comfortable. Even more comfortable is the glorious white leather captains chair that lives in this tiny room among the boxes. Its arms so welcoming, and its worn out skin is soft and comforting. Here in the big chair, amidst the maze of white boxes, I will sit and contemplate my day. In the big chair I can breathe.

I wore my brown glasses for the first time today, I have tried them on before but they have been neglected for the blue, pink and black frames thus far. Until now. Brown glasses say something a little different, they crave less attention and are more adult than the other pairs. I feel so grown up in brown glasses, now if only I had a pair of pants with no holes in them that aren't purple.

Oh and yes, I DO have 4 pairs of prescription glasses, I got them for $8 a pair, all thanks to a wonderful site called zenni optical! www.zennioptical.com (I am constantly spreading the gospel of zenni, they should give me a free pair!)

Tuesdays have come to be the bane of my existence, if I were a lasagna loving cat they would be my mondays. Tuesdays give me crazy anxiety. I have to go to santa cruz and do tons of work cause I only have one day there. Also they are a bunch of jerks who come to work stoned and can't count money, so their registers are always WAY off. I have to waste precious chunks of my precious life trying to explain said shortages when the most I can ever chalk them up to is "sloppy cash handling"

Okay eww I need to stop blogging about work! I'm getting really sleepy and starting to doze off/drool on myself. Thanks for listening blog town. I can always count on you!

OMG you like food? ME TOO!!!

http://foodauthority.blogspot.com/

these are the only crowded rooms where I'm not all alone

I took some pictures of my favorite (current) gilman graffiti last week. A lot of them make me laugh so I wanted to share them with you. The walls are constantly changing in this place so I am going to try to document them from time to time.


lets not let "our diffences" come between us anymore.
poor sewage sally!
Okay so you know how last time I said I would never forget? well this time I MEAN it.
west bay invitational lyrics <3
I'm not sure if this is meant as a command or a suggestion.
Dear Adam, I take back all those horrible things I wrote about your religion on the bathroom wall. I still heart you. Sorry.
Oh you know, some retard thing.
finally the truth comes out.
big dead punk fish.
I sure don't!
I have never actually seen Pat Libby eat a baby, but he does have pants.
cole is SUCH an asscactus!
It's already been BROUGHT!

when I die, please send me back as a bear.

so I can eat babies and save them from the harshness of this world.

escape from dish mountain

I just did the dishes, not just a few but ALL of the dishes. They had creeped up out of the sink and covered the counter. It was quite an extreme challenge and took over an hour. I deserve a trophy. Props to my roommate trevor for drying and cleaning the stove while I scrubbed. Big ups to the water heater for providing enough hot water to conquer dish mountain. I have prune fingers. Ewwww.

dream blogger come rescue me

Yet another peek into my subconscious. I was at a school or university of some sorts, it had very old buildings and I was in a group of girls. Someone needed to use the restroom and I knew where one was, it was old and historical and should have been locked but luckily it wasn't. We all snuck inside, it had beautiful tiles and looked fancy. All the toilets had weird junk in them like colorful stuff that wouldn't flush down. The plumbing was shot. I searched the place for one that would flush and none of them would so we left. All the little stalls were weird and some were big rooms with several toilets and no doors. This is how I imagine old fashioned toilet rooms being, everyone just socializing and pooing. In ancient Rome they used to poop in a hole that was over a stream of running water! I think they just sat next to each other and grunted away. What a world.

In my dream I was with these girls, a few of them weren't exactly nice to me but by the end of the dream we were cool again. I went to find another washroom and the one I found was a big room with a dirt floor and a toilet plus shower contraption in the middle. I saw what I thought was a cat but when I got closer it was a baby baboon. More baby baboons showed up and I took a shower, I don't know how I could have gotten cleaner with the dirt floor but I never said my dreams were logical. When I came out of the shower I went to find the girls. The one I was previously fighting with and I bonded over our fear of baboons and how we never wanted to go back in there. She kind of looked like the blonde chick from Dawsons creek, the one with the chubby face.

Then I woke up!

midmorning misadventures!

I've been doing this thing lately where I come home, eat dinner and then lay in bed to watch a movie only to pass out before its over. I have been asleep by 9pm a lot recently, which is irregular for me! This usually leads to me waking up at somepoint in the middle of the night uncomfortable and getting up to brush my teeth. Tonight when I woke up it seems I had made myself a nest out of my blankets, I was like a tiny bird in a big soft nest. This pleased me so in an attempt to not mess up the nest I stayed in bed, greasy, dirty teeth and all, until the need to get up became too overpowering.

I have been sick as of late, no flu like I originally expected, just an annoying sore throat. I have also been broke as of late, preventing me from buying the normal get well essentials. Being sick isn't exactly in my budget!! So I'm laying in bed, achey throat, dirty teeth, and greasy face. I get up to refresh myself and possibly hunt down a lozenge. After 5 minutes of searching I come to the conclusion that my hair is awesome when its slept on, and that my house is lozenge free. Total Bummer.

Last night was the Measure [SA] show at gilman! It was super fun and I had such a great time hanging out with them. There are very few people in the world I feel completely comfortable around, right now I can only think of two, but Mikey is definately one of them. I also have this weird innability to be sad when he's around. Rich is my other feel good friend, and he was there too so it was basically the best night I could hope for. The only sad part is, now that its over, I don't have anything nearly as cool to look forward to.

Photo blog!!

Melba sent me this hat, it is beautiful just like her. I love it.




me and tessa in oakland hanging up flyers, around the corner to the right is 1234 go!



the bay bridge, to get to SF


sourpatch! rich trying not to laugh

best sourpatch picture ever.

xtine's mad skillz.



A-ross from Maribelle

Admittedly a very handsome dude.


gigantic hairball in the corner of the thomas street shower!! AMAZING!!

mandie kissed me, I look sooo happy!

the shocker!!



Tessa rockin the Jammies Alexis made her wear!

Yesterday ruled. Me and Tessa went to oakland, put flyers everywhere, got delicious food at herbivore and listened to beautiful music in SF! I took lots of pictures so I will post some later. I got so many hugs and kisses too! (on the cheek of course! I'm no lip slut!) Best of all I drank a chocolate milkshake! Hell yeah!

Today was sub par at best. I spent most of it at work feeling totally sick with a fever. It started pretty good, Tessa stayed over so I got a nice hug goodbye this morning, and she gave me vegan donuts. Mmmm.

I got to work and shortly after got a call from my dentists office because I forgot I had an appointment!! Doh!! They let me rush in late and I got a cleaning. The lady told me my hair smelled good, she used the vibrating scraper, the regular scraper and the polisher, my teeth feel NEW! I was dissapointed to find out I have a very small cavity on one of my back molars. I am way too old to have a cavity, I guess I should lay off the sweets for a little while. I'm ashamed of me. The hygenist lady said I had really good hygiene though, she was impressed. I wish I had stronger enamel!

When I got back to work I ate the donut (can't see the dentist with donut in my teeth!) and immediately afterwards I started feeling really terrible and nauseous. After a while I had a fever so I took an ibuprofin, I think it helped. My fever went away (broke?) at least. I did very little work and whined a lot until it was time to go home.

Now I'm laying in bed watching the wire, I made soup and now I'm just trying to stay warm and rest.

OOh I almost forgot. I got a package in the mail from my friend Melba from toronto! She made me this adorable knit cap! It also looks totally awesome on my dome. It was a late christmas present, and probably the most thoughtful present I recieved. I know she had to have spent a lot of time on it, so it made me feel special! I have amazing friends!

emotional blog rampage!

Sorry bloggers! I didn't mean to scare you, I guess I sounded really bad. Admittedly life has been confusing lately, when I have no one to talk to I get inside my head and all the bad stuff comes out. I shouldn't need anyone to talk to, that's abnormal for me, but lately its been harder to be by myself. I'll be okay. I always am!

Yesterday was a pretty weird day, it started off great, I got tons of free food because we were doing inventory. Yum food! I also had 2 cups of coffee, which is unlike me, I usually do tea or decaf, but it was hot and free and I was cold and broke. By the end of the day my heart felt like it was going to burst! I blame the coffee! Also my coworker kept asking me dumb questions, evesdropping and whistling. (I am also a bad evesdropper, I guess now I know how annoying I am!) I really can't stand the guy, luckily on normal weeks we never work the same days. Phew.

Anyway, by the end of my work day I felt like I was having a mild anxiety attack and it didn't seem to go away when I got home, I ate too much, watched a lot of TV and then tossed and turned a lot. I tried to look at cool internet stuff but found my way to a very depressing blog which set the ball rolling so to speak.

I am like a big emotion sponge, when other people are sad, I get sad. I can't help it. Weird example: In high school I went with my friend to visit her fathers grave. I had met him a handful of times and he seemed cool, I knew how hard it was for her. I cried my eyes out while she kept it cool. That's just the kind of girl I am. Also crying is very commonplace for me, anyone who's spent more than a few days with me has seen me cry. Its how I express my feelings, I have active ducts!!

Today is going to be awesome. Tessa is coming over and we are going to berkeley and oakland to plaster the telephone poles with flyers for my upcoming shows. Specifically the Measure [SA] show this weekend and the two shows I have at the end of the month!! THORNS OF LIFE!! After that we are going to SF to enjoy the sweet soothing sounds of Maribelle from chicago (its my friend a ross he rules) and Sourpatch! I can't wait for today to start!

I can't sleep and you won't read this.

I'm sick. I'm anxious. I'm lonely.

I feel like I know a million and two people, but where are all my friends? Whenever I get close to people they run away. Its frustrating as hell because I know I'm a good person, I know I'm a good friend. I know I'm pretty, and funny, and smart. I know my hair smells good. I just want someone else to know. I just want someone to talk to. I don't want to be alone forever.

I shouldn't write in my blog when I'm sad, but no one reads it anyway.


If you're reading this just hit comment and mash the keys on the keyboard. Annonymous is fine, it would just be nice to know someones paying attention. This is like my 60th blog update with no comment! Maybe nothing I write about interests anyone but I doubt that.

Big ups to Jo stock for commenting once and to the creepy stranger dude who asked me out via blog comment months ago.

mandies bday: the VIDEO!

mandies bday 012, originally uploaded by prettymesss.

Last night we had a surprise dinner for my friend Mandie at Di Lac Cuisine. They sat us at a big table with a giant lazy susan in the middle. It was too tempting to resist. Here's a video of us being jerks and waiting for our food, I'm pretty sure the staff hated us... they wouldn't bring us anything we asked for unless we asked twice because they were too busy texting their girlfriends! BOO!

more NYE pics!

I took these with a disposable lomography camera with a red flash. Some of them turned out pretty cool. Either way I had a lot of fun taking them.

371943-R1-013-5_007, originally uploaded by prettymesss.

nomadic

I feel like I was in my car all day today! All I want now is to burrow into the blankets and never come out!

I started planning a tour for my band, I'm totally nervous about getting it all booked and saving enough money to afford it with all the bills I have to pay! I am excited to see new places and new faces! Its only going to be a week for spring break but hopefully it will be way too much fun.

Portland, Seattle, Boise, Reno here I come!

New Years Eve in pictures!

I love those stupid glasses!

animals!

she dropped the wine bottle, luckily she didn't try to keep drinking it. (while here I am snapping pictures, shame on me!)

OMG BBQ LOL BFF

Bottlerocket!

(not a bottlerocket! the neighbors had the good stuff!)